How low can she go indeed: Bobbi Kristina hits the spiral

Jesus be a warm glass of milk.

The wild child daughter of Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown is going party-crazy – and sources say her train-wreck parents have now stepped in to try to prevent her from developing addiction problems like them.

I'm not really surprised by this at all - I mean, you get Bobby Brown's sneer and you're bound to get his other ways. (Sidenote: How long before his gut arrives under her Christmas tree as well...)

I'm just trying to understand why DFACS or some agency hasn't stepped in here a long time ago, you know, back when I'm pretty sure they had this poor child sweeping up remnants of their Tony Montagna-eque piles of cocaina following nightlong snow parties.

This child of the kingdom has been through enough. So I'll let that A&P weave slide, along with any attendant questions about the bikini selection and her choice of "pose" (BodyMagic much?)

PS: This part= YAAAAAS.

... parents have now stepped in to try to prevent her from developing addiction problems like them.

Toss the flowers on the casket now!

S.C. Secession Ball Stirs Controversy AKA Secess Jam 2011 comin' to YOUR town!

Yaaaaaassss. This. Right. Here. PLEASE let me do the flyers.

The Sons of Confederate Veterans plan to hold a $100-per-person "Secession Ball" on Dec. 20 in Gaillard Municipal Auditorium. It will feature a play highlighting key moments from the signing of South Carolina's Ordinance of Secession 150 years ago, an act that severed the state's ties to the Union and put the nation on the path to the Civil War.

I'll let you dig up the part where they discuss the playing of "Dixie" which, sidepoint, is my ring tone.

Uh oh, here come the blacks starting up trouble:

NAACP members and supporters plan to hold a peaceful march in downtown Charleston the day of the ball, on Dec. 20, followed by a meeting and question-and-answer session focusing on slavery. Participants will watch segments of “Birth of a Nation,” a 1915 silent film that portrayed Ku Klux Klan members as heroes.

The Blacks are always being so touchy! This is that one or two bad blacks that strip club owner was tal'm 'bout earlier today. You know, the one who put up the "No Negro's" sign? He probably just wanted to have his own Secess Ball and The Black shut him down.

Why won't you let outrageous crackers be great?? Seriously, having live in La South for the past five years, I feel confident in saying that this type of antic is probably unfolding in a lot more places tha you want to think.

I don't know about you, but I already know what I'm wearing (hint: Red checked aprons are the new Little Black Dress)

Strip club owner posts “No Negroes Allowed” sign - because that's not a problem at all!

No shade, I'm about to get my own "No Negro's Allowed" sign if some of y'all keep it up.


(NBC ActionNews.com)
Strip club owner posts “No Negroes Allowed” sign

"I'm going to stick to my guns because I think I have the right as a business owner to reject service to anyone. It's not all the black people there are just a few bad ones," Prior says of his problems in the past.

Well I'm just glad he made it clear that there are only a few bad blacks. Ya gots to CLARIFY these types of things. Meanwhile, am I the only one who wants to know what the rest of that sign says? You know what, if that 1924-lookin' window into Christmas past is any indication, nevermind.

Outrageous Ornery Crackers: 10
Bad Blacks: 0

Today in Irrelevance...

Pic from Ja Rule's website (muffled laughter)

UPDATE: Ja Rule Gets Two Years, or sumpin' like that. Well I don't know about you, but I'm gonna have to take a few days off work.


Blank stare. This right here is devastating. I'm serious - I may need to hum and rock with it because I'm not sure how the community is going to rebound.

Rapper Ja Rule's future in hip-hop may be in jeopardy as a pending gun trial is set to begin as early as this week with jury selection reportedly taking place today.

I mean, WTF. We just lost Wesley (I'm collecting soaps, apple jelly and lip gloss for a Pelican Bay gift basket, BTW), DMX is actin' up and now this? I mean, Ja Rule brought up soooo many hits. Who can forget _____ . And then there was _______.

And I know exactly where I was when I first heard _________.

I implore you White America, don't take Ja Rule from us. Now excuse me while I go hum it out.

Racist cupcake commercial raises questions

Dear White People:

I'm pullin' so hard for you all. I want this reconcilliation thing to happen. Being hostile all the time is exhausting. I thought we might be united via Justin Beiber. Then you go and pull a stunt like this.

And sully the name of cupcakes too?

Food manufacturer Duncan Hines has found itself in some hot water with a promo for their microwaveable Amazing Glazes. The ad in question was called 'Hip-Hop Cupcakes' and features a set of vanilla cupcakes that get topped with a chocolate glaze and then morph into cartoon characters that clearly resemble racist minstrel imagery.

YouTube: The Hostile Negress Speaks!

I promised all my faithful little lambs a surprise this week and here it is - The Hostile Negress Speaks - an occasional indulgence for your eyes!

Divert your attention from my orange security blanket and my two-strands that are trying to transform into freeform locs. I'm natural batches!

Enjoy!

Aretha's Got the Big C (and I don't mean cream pie you jerk!)

Normally I would eviscerate Ms. Franklin. Not because I'm an evil Hostile Negress who should never have been freed, but for very obvious reasons that involve malappropriated spaghetti straps. But this here? Not funny at all madame.

The Soul Diva herself has The Cancer. Or so they say:

FOX 2 News in Detroit has learned that the "Queen of Soul" has cancer. A relative of Aretha Franklin tells reporter Al Allen that the icon has cancer. Another relative says the family is very concerned.

(can we PLEASE take a moment to go awf about how cunt she looks in this photo???? YASSSSSS!)

I was listening to NPR last night - yes, we negresses do listen to NPR - and there was a discussion of how far cancer has come into the public eye. Apparently back in the '70s, you know, before things mattered, people wouldn't even admit to having cancer. "The Big C" they called it, according to the show, and I recall an episode of Good Times (you knew it was coming) in which Florida's boyfriend has cancer and calls it "The Big C."

Where am I going with this? Nowhere at all! Cancer sucks and Good Times was a great show. I'm just sayin'!

Oh, and I love the full length version of the Big Re Re Snickers commercial: