Monday, December 6, 2010

CNN busts open braid slave trade! (put down your Kemi oil and do something!)

*singing* Lawd lawwd lawd laaaaaaaaawd! I thought we overcame!!!???

From CNN:

Held as slaves, now free

The girls' families sent them to the United States after being assured they would receive a better education. But once they arrived, they were forced to work in hair braiding shops across the Newark area -- just a short drive from New York City, right in the shadow of the Statue of Liberty...

Let me shout out E-Marvelous (we’ll get into why you’re not following me on Blogger over cyber tea ... ) for outpointing this tremendous tale of human slavery, as told by CNN, our brothers in the struggle.
Don’t sniggle colored people. Today, right now, in plain sight, Africans are being enslaved – as hair braiders. You read that right – Kembe and Yetembi and them are being chained to chairs, beaten with rattan rods and ravished so that YOU can have some Senegalese twists. Africans bagged up and shipped out for YOUR Shenehneh braid whims. Now don’t you feel like the filthy, yet well-coiffed individual you are???

Apparently this has been poppin’ off in Newark, New Jersey, where, though I’ve never visited, I am 90 percent confident many people feel they too are enslaved. The two girls in the video were trundled off from Africa with promises of wealth and video ho status (my add) and instead emerged from their transcontinental flight to find themselves sleeping on pissy mattresses by night and poppin’ buckshots by day. That's happened to me at least twice.

Now, The Hostile Negress isn’t about downplaying the terror of slavery. I’ll leave that to CNN. Seriously, are you comparing the systematic, centuries long pandemic of Africans being abducted, raped, tortured, beaten and made to sleep with creepy old white men to this? Because seriously, while it’s way jacked up that these girls had to do dukey braids for free, I’m gonna say it falls just a little short of the scale of the Middle Passage. Moreover (don’t you love that word) I have to question the timing of this: The case is over and at no point during her oddly punchy delivery does the reporter explain why we’re suddenly talking about this. Better yet – has CNN never been to Harlem or New York in general? You can’t ride the MTA without being assaulted by throngs of dead-eyed African girls demanding that you come in for some discount straightbacks. Take a walk down 123rd and peek into a couple of those “salons” – hell I feel enslaved just lookin’ in those dirty places!

Where’s my CNN expose damnit.

The Hostile Negress is growing increasingly concerned with the pattern of negro "mess"poses over at CNN. Lest we forget the recent “ministry or minstrels” piece about shouting preachers; the piece on whether the black church keeps black women single or hell really just the entire Black in America series. I'm starting to wonder whether these kee kees are on purpose!

A few notations:
- Is anyone else catching the irony of one of the “slave girls” having braids? Kizuwanda better not have had anything to do with this. The cycle continues!!
- And did anybody else find themselves distracted by that weave of many colors? I was fascinated.
- Can we discuss the younger girl’s clear victimization at the hands of eyelash weave traffickers? This isn’t funny so don’t you dare laugh – women in my family are dropping like flies at the hands of these people. They must be stopped! #giraffegameproper
- And did nobody catch the REAL reason why this happened? One look at the ringleader and we see what the issue was: Her snatched back hairline is clearly suffering the devastating ravages of too many braids. She was simply seeking justice for her decimated edges, targeting one tight-gripped braider at a time.
Can anyone blame her?No justice, no (hair)piece!!!!!


  1. Well I'm sure many people even Americans have dreams of grandeur in this country... and those dreams don't come to pass. and what African aint making more money braiding hair anyway them heffas make cake and live 4 to a mansions in Mitchellville, MD. I just got my Senegalese twists done this past Saturday LOL

  2. I think this is sad. As much as those damn braids cost they can give the chicks better living standards come on. If 85cent can feed a starving child, I'm sure $150 can at least get you a week of stay at Extended Stay. Because of the conditions in some of these girls native villages, they could simple tell them the truth and they might still leave zamunda jump at the chance go to America. I'm just saying.

  3. @Donnice - I just want you to think about this article when you're whippin' your braids back and forth!

    Won't anybody think of the children? lol